Blog #7 Music Has Shaped Me; Music Has Made Me Real

In everyone’s life there comes a time when they have to put aside the bad times and find something to make them happy. In my life, that beautiful something came to me already, and it’s called music. Music has shaped me; music has made me real. I don’t think that I would be able to express any of my feelings if I didn’t have the music to express them for me. It’s easy for me to be myself because I have the lyrics and melody that I can relate to and feel connected with.

There’s one song in particular that when I first listened to it I was immediately in love. The song is Someday by The Strokes. Normally the music I would say I relate to is romantic and just downright pathetic, but this song means more than that. The song ultimately means that he, (the singer), needs to slow down his life and remember the days when he was happy. It also means that he wants to turn the tables and try harder to be okay with himself. The line in the song I think sticks out for me the most is, “When we was young, oh man, did we have fun. Always, always. Promises, they break before they’re made. Sometimes, sometimes.” The reasons I think I connect with this song so much is because on occasion I forget to remember when I was a little girl, and sometimes I forget to be thankful for my family and friends. This song makes me reflect back and think about what it was like to be little, thoughtless, and excited all the time.

Music has allowed me the once in a lifetime opportunity to live forever. When I listen to music, I’m lifted up and turned into a completely different person. There are songs that make me sad, but then again, life is about feeling things, and sadness just happens to be one of those emotions you can’t avoid! I also listen to a lot of happy songs, and one of them is, Do You Realize by The Flaming Lips. I absolutely adore this song because it’s so perfect when you need a lift up or a kick down. There aren’t enough words to describe how this song makes me feel or what the song even means. But, I do know that the lines that mean the most to me are, “Do you realize- that you have the most beautiful face? Do you realize- we’re floating in space? Do you realize- that happiness makes you cry? Do you realize- that everyone you know will someday die? And instead of saying all of your goodbyes- let them know. You realize that life goes fast. It’s hard to make the good things last.” Those lyrics are words that I live by because they are completely true. Everyone needs to realize that they’re beautiful and beauty is not only on the outside but also can be reflected on the inside. People need to understand that death isn’t something you should be afraid of, but instead should be looked at as freedom for those who have lived their life as much as they can because “life goes fast…and… it’s hard to make the good things last.” I think that everyone should say how he or she feels. So don’t say goodbye; instead, say that you will meet again someday. The world is a messy place, but music gives me the ability to clean it all up. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFnjZY1vRzk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zYOKFjpm9s

Blog #6 When the World Knocks You Down...Stand.

In reality no situation is perfect. There is not one person in the world who has a silver platter handed to them. In reality...at any time that once "perfect" moment could shatter and break into a million pieces before you even blink your eyes. I don't mean to sound depressing, or depressed, because I'm neither! I'm a particularly happy person who just happens to know a lot about messing up. Everyone messes up, and a lot of times when people make mistakes it can be hard to fix them. In the past I've hurt people I love, been the puppet master to people's hearts, and crossed lines I knew I should not  have. It's not easy to admit that you're wrong but the one thing you can do is admit that you're sorry. In my mind, I've always felt like my mistakes can't be forgiven because if someone ever did those things to me, I'd never have the guts to forgive and forget. But, I'm often flabbergasted by how compassionate and accepting of the truth people are.

The world has knocked me down plenty of times and I've always seemed to slowly but surely make my way back above water. Of course, with problems comes responsibility. If you hurt someone, it's your job to make it right again, because in the end "you get what you give." My advice to those who are in peril, and in need of a way to fix their situation is to never lose hope. Referring back to my own regrets, there were times when I felt like if I didn't make something right or if I didn't make a person love me again like they once did, that I would regret that for the rest of my life. Grudges are hard to hold on people that you've grown so close with. Even the harshest of people have a hard time forgetting their loyalty to someone. You have to be honest and say absolutely EVERYTHING that you feel. Personally, I've never held back in any situation even if it would be in my favor to do so. The reason is because if you don't say how you feel then that person will never know.

I believe that if you've been pushed down, hurt, torn apart, or if you feel like all of your tears will soon run out, you need to stand up. The first step is to stand up, because once you're up you can finally learn to walk forward. Even if the world seems to close and push you further and further towards the ground...keep walking forward. 

This is a poem about being strong, and doing what you believe in.

There is inside you
all of the potential
to be whatever you want to be,
all of the energy
to do whatever you want to do.
Imagine yourself as you would like to be,
doing what you want to do,
and each day, take one step
towards your dream.
And though at times it may seem too
difficult to continue,
hold on to your dream.
One morning you will awake to find
that you are the person you dreamed of,
doing what you wanted to do,
simply because you had the courage
to believe in your potential
and to hold on to your dream.

Blog #5 Dare To Be Vintage

I have become obsessed with everything vintage, and from the 1920s or 1930s. My inspiration in those time periods varies from photography, painting, poetry, literature, or anything you could possibly think of. Back in the 1920's, great writers (for example, Hemmingway) lived and inspired people through what they had to say. People believed in what was true and brought it to their culture in order to show people the truth and what truly matters. Photography, in particular, has made me discover so many things about life. I've learned the views of others as well as my personal views. 

In the picture on the left, Sam is holding a guitar, wearing a striped shirt, and my goal was to make him look as if he was connecting with his guitar. Music was one of the many things I've found most intriguing about older time periods. When most people think of vintage they think of hippies, peace signs, and tie-dye. Well, not me. When I think of vintage the first thing that comes to my mind is a puffy white dress dragging on the floor elegantly, and a girl wearing a feather in her hair with red lipstick and a cigar in her mouth. If you haven't already guessed, this is my idea of the 1920s. Another thing I think of is Paris. Paris is the one place I would love to live most. It's beautiful, romantic, and in a word...poetic. Back in the 1920s or 30s it must've been wonderful to be able to see so much, but I bet back then the people took it for granted. 

The picture on the right was especially hard for me. I had to find a way to make people think VINTAGE but believe MODERN. I used a washing machine because that was the one thing I could think of that I find I take for granted the most. It's not easy for me to modernize my pictures and make them look as if they are representing the present as opposed to the past. The picture is of me using my washing machine. A washing machine is a modern day tool that people use to wash their clothes, and wasn't something that people in 1920s had. 

The reason this entry is called "Dare To Be Vintage" is because I try so hard to believe that this is not the correct time period for me. I truly do belong in a time period that took place a long time before me, and even though some may say that isn’t true, not once have I ever tried to be anything but vintage.

Blog #4 Wild vs Sophisticated

I live my life only to be different. The idea of being average or ordinary is probably my worst fear. I don't know for sure, but I hope that if you asked people they would say I'm creative and unique. It's difficult for me to understand why people would want to be just like everyone else. I couldn't imagine wanting to live any longer if someone perceived me as, "just another girl that acts the same as everyone else does." I wouldn't say I'm wild, but I would say I'm passionate about life. My passion for being creative and being everything I wish I could be, has pushed me so far through my life.

Recently, at my George School and Pennington interviews people have asked me what I can bring to their schools. The only answer I could come up with was that no matter what, I will always support my friends into being exactly whom they are, not to hold anything back, and that self-reflection is the key to knowing who you are. 

My pictures represent my two sides. During every day life I find myself wanting to break free from the social norms, and escape the cage I like to call, "school." The picture of me in the tiger costume (also referred to as my Halloween Costume) represents my wild side and the side of me that is dying to break free. It shows outrage, and beams every ounce of self-reflection I could come up with. The other side of the picture is my more sophisticated look. My curls, red lipstick, and shirt that is much more mature in comparison to the tiger snuggy, all show the side of me that holds things back. I have trouble showing my feelings sometimes, and that picture shows exactly what it's like. In the photo I'm not smiling or moving at all, and the tension in my face shows my willingness to be FREE.

Blog #3 Mom and Me

My relationship with my mom is different from anyone else's... at least I'd like to think so. My mom is not only my best friend, but she's my hero. It's always been difficult for me to admit or explain my feelings about my mom, but in a brief statement, she's done everything for me and I couldn't be more thankful. She's always been hardworking and sometimes when I used to have to go with my babysitter while she worked in New York, I would feel lonely, but every night when she got home we would talk for hours until finally I had to be forced into sleep.

Mother and daughter relationships are sometimes portrayed as a game of "yes and no," where the daughter fights for more texting minutes, and the mother says no. For my mom and I it's never been that sort of game, in fact it's always been the opposite. As with every family, agreement isn't always in our favor, but we've always made some sort of compromise.

She has always been the mother with the easy-going personality, and I've always been the stubborn one with all the opinions. I tell her absolutely everything even when I try my hardest to hold my feelings back. There have been days when I’ve gotten picked up from school, turned on the music, curled up in a ball and cried, but every time I do that she stands by waiting for my dramatic weep-a-thon to end so she can ask what's going on. After my long Dr. Phil session with her she just holds me there because she knows that in my case, silence is the best medicine.

I love my mom, and I hope she knows that. She's my whole world, but she doesn't know I'm writing so poetically about her, so before she finds out I'm going to explain the pictures.

I put a picture of her and I from a long time ago next to a picture more recent, because I wanted to show proof of how close we've always been.

I LOVE YOU MOM.

Love and Togetherness

Ordinary life is boring, but when you spend it with someone you love it can make you feel like it was never boring at all. One of the definitions of love describes happiness between two people and the ability to show affection towards that "special someone." There have been times when my belief in love has faded, but then I remember the millions of people in love right this second. I don't know of anyone who has said that love is easy, but I’ve always believed that love can easily grow from being happy. Unfortunately I still haven’t exactly figured out what happiness is. I don’t think happiness can be shown just by smiles and laughter, but I do think that being in a relationship and being able to be completely who you are and not question that, is happiness.

The reason I took a picture of holding hands is because hands are my favorite part of the body. I've learned over time that there are key ways to discovering about a person just by looking at their hands and knowing what the certain lines mean. When two hands are entwined into each other it shows a connection between people, which to me, is exactly what love is. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iK9PLdVXK4&feature=related
This link is a Charlie Brown scene about happiness. It's a kids perspective of what happiness is.

Best Friends

          As people grow older they make new friendships, lose old ones, and sometimes are able to keep the friendships they've made along the way. For me, my best friend who I've been best friends with for seven years has always been there for me and I know always will be there. Her name is Gabriella and she has taught me everything. We met during dance classes and ever since have been inseparable. She's always been the sporty, drop-dead-gorgeous, completely flawless girl that everyone has to love because of her undeniably outgoing personality. Then there's always been me, the spunky, goofy, not-so-sporty girl. Together we're a team. We've always been able to finish each other’s sentences and know exactly what we're both thinking. One minute with each other and already we've burst into laughter. It hasn't always been easy to be completely in love with the same best friend your whole life, but sometimes a rocky mountain is the most fun to climb.

          The reason I think that my friendship with Gabby fits into the topic of "Fitting Into Someone Else's Shoes" is because we're so different, but we still love each other. For some people, friendships are about how much you have in common, but for me and Gabby it's different. We don't have everything in common, but at the end of the day I know she will always be my best friend and if anything will be the only one I turn to for help with my lacking soccer skills.